last night’s meltdown?  i know you’re all wondering what it was about.  the whole time i told myself i was being completely silly — who gets so upset simply because they have not yet found a reception venue?  apparently i do.  two weeks of looking and i felt defeated.  so i called crying.

the words he spoke were what i needed: “this isn’t God.  He’s taken care of everything so far and He’s gonna take care of this.”  at first i thought, really?  my reception?!  please — let’s be realistic.  my reception is my responsibility.

what faith and trust is in this heart.

this morning came and my heart was still heavy.

sometimes you feel downright foolish for praying some prayers.  but i asked.  asked for the venue i wanted to be available.  yeah, i needed to finalize the plans for my wedding day, but more so, my heart needed to know if He really does take note of all the concerns in our hearts.  you could remind me that my life has already proven His goodness and His knowledge of every single hidden prayer ever thought simply through these last few months, but somehow my heart wasn’t so confident this morning.

an hour and a half later the phone rang, my hopeless voice answered, and suddenly i was receiving the answer to that prayer.  i had what i wanted for a reception.  i had my barn.

a few minutes later this is what i found in my news feed.

it’s true.  He does care.  more than i ever think.

so… i’m looking for bridesmaid dresses.  want to help me, God?