louissa sinclair

you can call me pathetic and tell me that i’m acting like i’m leaving forever and i know that i’ll whole-heartedly agree. who knows — maybe i will be gone forever after this, but i’m feeling the crunch of time and am very much wanting to spend as much time with people as i can. today was time with my little buddy. well, okay, he’s not so little (i come up to his shoulders. he’s the tall one.), but he was my bud this past school year. he’s a great kid… i’ll miss him.

i’m going to a Keith Urban concert this friday. i know, you’re so jealous. you just need a sister like her.

- pardon my so unprofessional entry for the night -

i know i started this trip out by saying that i might take a break from writing and so far, i’ve never been more consistent doing just that, but i really can’t help myself when every night people are in bed by midnight and if i’m to have fun with pictures and such, this is the time to do it.

so for this evenings entertainment…

i remembered that i needed to bring the sea to you, so a few pictures of our day at the beach. unfortunately it is just a few pictures. i have officially run out of space for this month.

and (sisters, please don’t hate on me too much) some videos! they really aren’t all that entertaining — just shows you what we do when we’re in a car. and of course both include some… shall we call it, “music”? if the sound is off at first, close the browser and click again.

keith urban and alison krauss

and carrie underwood should totally use this picture for this song. or maybe i’ll make a card out of it and send it to everyone before i leave. : )

and don’t forget to remember me…

we all were busily getting ready for dinner — one was gathering the babies and another was telling everyone to go outside and get ready to eat. he was out at the grill with the ribs and she was quickly finishing up the steaming of clams. everyone was talking and everyone was moving. i ran upstairs to get sandals for our little girls feet when her mother passed by and casually said, “so you’re accepted, huh?”

my heart skipped a beat and i’m sure my eyes got wider. “did i what? did i get accepted?” now perhaps my being so surprised seems rather silly to you, but there was the chance that for some reason, the director of the school would look at my application and decide that they don’t want me or that it was sent in too late. i guess not.

we searched for hours and with the help of daddy and a brother, a ticket has been purchased. i leave the country in a little over a month. i’ll be half-way around the world for six months. and never has there been so much excitment inside me while at the same time such an ache in my chest.

when it was done, he looked up and said, “so that’s it. you’ll be gone. but it’s only six months and you’ll come back still our little girl.” and i realized just how hard this will be for me. i’m not the one who’s supposed to leave. i’m the one who stays at home and watches everyone else go off on their adventures. i’m the one who is supposed to be the sinclair child who stays in the north country. i’m supposed to stay with my family.

tonight i said i was thankful that i knew what the next six months look like for me. the Lord knows what He’s doing and i’m determined to trust in Him. He really will direct my path — He’s guided me up to this point and i’m confident He will continue to do so.

one month of loving on my family and friends…

I left home when I was seventeen
I just grew tired of falling down

And the people who love me still ask me
When are you coming back to town
And I answer quite frankly
When they stop building roads
And all God needs is gravity to hold me down

alison krauss is always soothing to my soul.

so i don’t really want to write right now.

just wanted to let you know that i have pictures here.  enjoy them since my space is running out for the month.

yesterday was the city and today is the beach.

yes, i’m loving my life.

this is me, a very frustrated louissa. this is me after spending… well, far too long on this MAC, uploading photos, resizing and ridding them of red eye, only to realize that apparently i don’t know what i was doing and nothing worked. this is me with my very nice camera by my side with a very full memory stick full of pictures from a very memorable weekend and first day here on the Island, and unable to show you any of them. and yes, i’m frustrated. i, the “nothing-ever-phases-her” girl am completely annoyed. so much for being brilliant.

we walked on the docks and little boys let out “oohs” and “ahs” at the sight of all the boats while a proud daddy/papa held their hands and pointed things out. the rest of us tagged along enjoying the smell of the sea (i love that fish smell) and our hands getting moist from the air. we stopped where some were fishing and curious little minds looked and asked questions, we stopped and took pictures of the sinclair girls all together, and we stopped after our walk through the town to go back home.

i didn’t want to leave. as she put it, “there’s just something about being near water.” it’s amazing. i stood there with everyone else looking out tonight and i felt so at peace. i felt ready to do whatever it is He asks of me and ready to give what He may ask of me. it’s not often that my love is so strong that i whisper the words, “take what You want. nothing that i desire compares with You.” oh, i’ve said them before and have urged others to do the same, but i don’t think i’ve ever meant them like i did tonight.

i’m missing my brother and wishing that he had been able to come.

and that’s all. my sister is once again wondering what’s taking so long. one thing i do know is that if i do go to germany, six months will be a long time to be away from my sisters. sisters really do make the best friends.

the house is quiet, lights have been turned off, and most are in bed asleep or quickly heading in that direction.  obsessive that i’m here?  perhaps, but the white MAC sitting on the corner table in the kitchen seemed all too lonely here by itself.

i found myself on the road thursday night.  at 12:30 a.m. i found myself in the drivers seat making my way to a city that i’ve gone to regularly for the past few years.  the townhouse is there and the creek that stinks so badly.  they have starbucks and large movie theaters and every lovely store like Talbots Outlet.

today i sat in the passengers seat and was in charge of the cd’s and navigation.  three of us found ourselves in the busy NYC with cars all around, police officers who weren’t very helpful, and can you believe it?  not enough maps.  i found that i do better with navigating when my ear is glued to a phone and is listening to a person who is sitting in front of a computer.

so i’m here, in another familiar place.  i grew up coming here and visiting the sea and the city and i’ll do it again this week.

my sister whispers to me, “are you done yet?”  my cue to go to bed.

goodnight.

i’ll be going away for a week.

perhaps i’ll actually take a week off from blogging.

or not. after all, i just wrote on an application that my hobby is blogging.

anyway.

toodles.

- painting my toe nails

- making money (little is better than none, right?)

- massive washing machines that i can throw all my clothes into

- having the best family

- vacation with that very best family

- friends who/are visited/visiting that always make me smile

- leaving two night from now for a whole week

- walks along a river

- remembering a random gift of money i recieved last year from a very lovely couple who live hours away from me

- evenings on the porch with ice cream in hand (ice cream always makes things better)

- money that i will one day earn to pay everything off with

- my Jesus — who is always easy to “reconnect” with

- having to do laundry tonight, packing tomorrow night, leaving the next night

- worries about too little money and too much to buy

- not spending enough time with Him and feeling the effects (affects?) of it

so the background is a little dark… lets try this again.

louissa, ya got a funny face.

but you get the idea. my hair.

…EDIT…

you had no idea we were this cool.

little boy: if they ever do anything [a musical, play, etc.] about Snow White, you should be her, because you really are as white as snow.

me: huh. thanks, buddy.

totally original, huh?